Posts by Thunder Rider

105

I'm a Neutral Jehovah's Witness

by Martini in

jw
friends

dear brothers and sisters,.

i martini, will confide in you that i have become a neutral jehovah's witness.

i wonder if i'm not coining a new phrase here!.

Thunder Rider

Martini,

Right is right. Follow that ideal and you can't go wrong. Wrong is Wrong, and when the "guys in charge" are wrong it's time to find your own way. It's lonely at first but there's a bunch of good people here abouts. Bend an ear.

Thunder

47

A newbie says hello

by Icansaylucky in

hello, i've been a lurker for about a year now and finally decided to register and start posting.

i don't have time to tell my story right now, but plan on doing so soon.

i guess i'm putting it off as i'm not sure where to start without it being a book.

Thunder Rider

Icansaylucky,

Welcome aboard. The crying thing isn't just for the gals though. I've shed a few myself. It gets better.

Thunder

40

Did being a JW stifle your ambition?

by ballistic in

jw
friends

did being a jw stifle your ambition?

did not needing to plan for the future affect your career choices and your consequent wealth?.

i'm not simply talking about following the advice to not take up an education which has been discused many times, but i'm going further to say that those brought up in "the truth" had their whole philosophy moulded and shaped in a way which never searched for more or wanted more; a non-materialistic outlook.. now some may still say materialism is evil, or that being brought up this way leads to a more content life.. the cynics, like myself, will say that keeping people 'happy but poor' is the genius of the rich.. i've had some success after leaving the org, after taking up education and so on, but it has taken time.

Thunder Rider

Balistic,

Stifled is an understatement. I was told at age 7 that I was going to be shepherding lambs and lions. What a crock. Pisser is I told my kids the same thing. Now my daughter is grown with a child of her own and my son is going into the Marines. I wish I had persued an education, I would have liked to have made a difference as a doctor or somthing. Instead, after highschool I took less than glamorous jobs and have scraped by financialy. I split from the org. when I brought some "discrepencies" in the literature to the elders attention and was told to "let it go". I found myself at age 30 without a faith, without a god and without a career. All was not lost though. I let my previously squelched imagination run wild and wrote a novel. Hooray for me! The book is scheduled for release in February. I intend to send a signed copy to the brothers who told me that I would never ammount to anything out in the "world". I got about 40 years left on this rock and I intend to make the most of it. I'll go out with a bang not a wimper.

Thunder

Edited by - thunder rider on 16 January 2003 23:28:9

16

How Did Your Adolescence Go?

by Englishman in

jw
friends

i was chatting to an old aquaintance about some of the weid and wonderful conflicts that i had gone through when i left the jw's.

she works as a therapist of some renown locally, so i was interested in her viewpoint.

she said that, in her opinion, anyone who's adolescent development was overly restricted by, for example, their religion, would have to clear away the mental stuff that had been held back during this critical time.

Thunder Rider

I was a JW from age 7 through age 30. I defenitely felt the restriction of "theocratic order" growing up. To this day I find it hard to interact with strangers and at parties am not much more than a wall flower. If not for my wife Sheila I probably would never meet new people. My need to "rebel" or exert my opinions in my teenage years stayed in check until I left the "Lie". I found myself doing immature things in my thirty's. It's actually quite enjoyable being my age and doing all those "foolish" things we normally attribute to youth.

The only thing that I can say was good for me about being so strictly controlled in my teen years is that I went to my marriage bed a virgin. I know a lot of you are going to laugh or snub that comment, but I have been and always be proud that I have only ever been with my Sheila. When I deciced to leave the "Lie", I lost my family, my God and my faith. What I had to hold on to was the pride in my marriage amd my relationship with my wife.

There is a lot of anger here in the posts against the JW's and I understand it and have some anger myself, but I prefer to dwell not on the loss of the time I spent with them, but on the time I have left to be happy.

Thunder

5

My poetry for you to enjoy , ( i hope )

by wildfire in

behind the walls of darkness, can the light shine thru???.

will our minds allow us to seek the cherished memories or relive the tortured days of youth.. do we dare to give up a piece of our sanity to envision a happier time.......... the tears are real, the fears keep us from exposing our vulnerbility,,, do we risk becoming a pawn...... the clock ticks away,, the stage is set..,,,will our performance be the one they want to see... and if its not, does that mean life was just a game to be won or lost????????.

behind the walls we see things more clearly if only for a moment.....we dare to expose our lives to people unknown to us.......... will the light be a source of comfort or another roadblock meant for a meaningless search of unanswered question?????????

Thunder Rider

Wildfire:

Great poems!!!Here is one of mine and one of SheilaM's hope she hasn't posted these already!

A youthful soul with eyes trained forward to a false promise. Biblical blinders.
For one with such a promising and bright future, good times were few. Holy halter.
Innocent flesh covered with the scars of self inflicted sin. Witnesses whip.
A back bent under the burden of bearing witness to lies. Evangelical arthritis.
Tuesday, Thursday, Sunday, five meetings a week. Approved association.
Circuit and district conventions. Myriad on myriad of brothers. So alone in the crowd.
Our years are only 70 or 80 if we have special mightiness. I wasted 20.
I remained apart from the world while. No longer. The dog to its vomit?
I delved into the word and found discrepancies. I wanted to make the Truth my own.
I asked questions. They went unanswered. Accept on faith = comply or else.
From delivering talks from the platform and working the literature counter. Servant.
To bad association publicly reproved. All because I wanted to hear the Truth.
Cast aside, no longer wanted by those representing a loving God. Marked.
God hates a liar, I was that. Millions now living will never die. Bullshit.
I was a liar because I believed and witnessed to the lie. Field service fallacies.
I dont blame God for hating me. I hate myself for my part in the lie. Door to door dupe.
I wonder how many lives my preaching ruined. My wifes.
I will live the rest of my years on this world doubting everything. Color me Thomas.
I will never be taken again. Once bitten twice shy.
I traded Truth for light. Faith for fact. Living for hope is now hoping to live.
70 or 80? Maybe, but not if I have anything to say about it.. I want my 20 back.
I will however shine a light on the darkness that is the organization. Fact, not truth.
Fact doesnt need faith, it stands alone. Right is right.
My flesh is healed, my eyes wander the wonders of life, I stand tall not stooped.

Author: Christopher Madonia

_For the victims_

The world is so much like a rose, varying layers.

It takes time to see, what the true colors may be.

Yes, there are thorns, some small and needle sharp.

Seems those on the most beautiful, are like knives.

Sometimes, while tending them, after being pricked again and again.

I worry that the wounds will become infected, or that they may scar.

I wonder why I bother,

There are other things I could tend.

But none as beautiful, none that smell so sweet.

So, I put up with the needles, I live with the knives.

Because I tend the roses, not the thorns.

Sheila Madonia (Roses are the world and it's wonders Thorns are the abusers and their enablers)
_________________

52

CALLING ALL BIKER TRASH!

by MYOHNSEPH in

jw
friends

from some of the posts i've seen, animal and i aren't the only 'biker trash' here.

i'll show you mine, if you'll show me yours!

Thunder Rider

That's my ride. My second love, SheilaM is my first.

Thunder

31

Did you throw your meeting clothes out?

by sleepy in

jw
friends

just been clearing some space in my house and deciding what to get rid of.i have a whole rack of "meeting clothes" shirts , suits ties etc that i have never worn since i left.i kept a few shirts and a couple of suits just in case i need them sometime.what a load of money those clothes most have cost me.one extra good reason for leaving, and think of all those dry cleaning bills you'll miss as well.bad luck if you work in an office.